A Fan Blowing Your Way aka My Biggest Fan

In Relationships on September 1, 2014 at 9:09 am

As usual, whilst I was wandering along, doing my own dastardly thing, what should hit, but the arrow of that little cherub.  I must be one sitting duck, for all the arrows that have pierced my heart.  And it must have been a disturbingly long and convoluted arrow that would find its mark again.  Does Cupid use me for target practice for his most unconventional arrows?  Perhaps the holes in my chest are so broad, and the skin over my heart so stretched, as to enable the easy access for another of his arrows that would have bounced off another, or that would have not had a smooth glide into the heart.  Ah well.

In any case, this is a religious year for me.  Perhaps it is time to reconsider religion in my life and the purpose it plays. But somehow, for all that I’ve experienced and seen, I find religion yet another form of living (or life theme!) to choose from.  We’re sporty, or we’re not, we’re foodies or we’re not … we’re religious or we’re not.  Yes? And upon deciding on a lifestyle, we stick to it, and abide by it in making all decisions, and that further entrenches us in the lifestyle we choose.

I say this because of what I’ve learnt from two years back – that there is not such thing as strange, it’s whether I have seen it before or not.  Out of 6 billion people in the world, there are 6 billion individual lives to lead, and a bulk of them are coerced along the same directions, by society – to make them easier to manage, to herd the flock in a predetermined direction.  We are human because we are given the ability to think beyond the herd, and break out on our own. But for every individual who wants to break out beyond the norm, there are also others who want to fit in within the norm. And this norm is determined by the culture we grow up in.  In any case, whatever exists in the world, no matter how individualistic, humans are herd creatures, and we often look for people who are in the same boat as us – from a similar lifestyle, to a similar preference.  It is indeed hard to find a truly individualistic person who needs not seek companionship and a meeting of minds, body and soul to make their journey on earth a little more pleasant.

And who am I to judge – given a short span of time on earth.  Who am I to judge my predecessors, and the future generations, what they may think and what they may do with their lives? We are each free to choose.  If you think about it, even murderers have a kinship with fellow murderers – there are so many of them, that we have jails for them  – a fraternity of like-minded individuals, as scary as it may sound.   Though few, who are the rest of us to judge against them?  Is the majority always right?  As witnessed in the burning of so-called witches who were gifted in healing arts back in the middle ages, the majority was often misled.

In any case, my biggest fan is turning into one whirlwind of a lifetime.  Time flies literally when we meet and talk and talking honestly is what I have to give to this person (and myself) now.  And at the same time discover (uncover) my pain, my forgiveness, my experiences, my happiness and my sorrows – all over again – from a new light – that of a wiser (I hope) person, 18 years later.  In sharing things I’ve never shared with another soul before, it cleanses me in a way.  It is really really nice (no better word for it) to be listened to and understood and un-judged, and simply loved.  In his arms I feel cherished, protected, and needed.  I feel that I can do no wrong, and I feel empowered and emboldened to be who I truly am.  Life’s tough as it is, and here is another individual who is mature enough to understand that, and to see the end of life for what it is, and our journey together as simply that – a journey.  From him I understand that love can grow, and that love can also wither, but all the more, how precious love is.

But as with every silver lining, there is a cloud, and within this cloud lies a storm brewing of murky proportions.  It’s sad when it hangs over our heads, and sadder when it rains.  But perhaps it will be better for it to rain and then blow away.  In the meantime, we huddle under its shadow and savour each precious second that we can before it pours.  It’s intense, it’s exciting, and it’s uncertain – which just serve to heighten its preciousness, and make us cherish it more.

I so wish that my biggest fan could also blow away this cloud, and that sunny days may surface. But it looks like we’re in for long gloomy days ahead.  Stay tuned for the weather report 🙂



Peter Pan of the Whales

In Uncategorized on February 5, 2014 at 5:45 pm

I call this friend Peter Pan because he truly doesn’t grow up.  He still maintains his fondness for the youthful things in life, and his verve and overall gaiety with life and his interactions with the people around him are refreshing indeed.

This friend of mine has always been special to me.  He is a simple, contented person, and yet intelligent, inquisitive and inspirational.  He does so many things for others in his life, and he is not interested to fight a war for glory, or politics, preferring to give of himself where he can, and he will always do so.

I am glad that after all these years, he has still not changed. Despite my changing philosophies and outlook in life, we could still share common ground and we had fun.  We happened to meet this year because of a long forgotten email that I had sent him 3 years ago. He replied to the email, and lo and behold, I had not changed my email address.  I replied and shortly after we met for dinner.

At dinner, we caught up on 7 years worth of happenings (at least!), as the last time I saw him was in my previous office at Telok Ayer and that was in 2007-08. Incidentally when I parked the car to meet him, an ex-colleague of the said Telok Ayer office honked at me in the carpark. Fate does have a way to play with us!

Peter Pan shared with me his recent creepy encounter, and how he discovered the Laws of Attraction.

What happened was this:

About 3 years ago, Peter Pan had started a company with a friend. They rented a black and white bungalow as office which also became Peter Pan’s residence during that period. The partnership did not end amicably and Peter Pan subsequently found himself without a home.   He quickly searched for one and found a home that was asking for a relatively low rent, which he could move into the next day (that was how urgent his lodging situation had become).  He had gone to see the flat at night, and agreed to rent it.  He also forgot that it was the seventh month (ghost month) period, where one is not supposed to move into any new locale.

Peter Pan stayed in his new place with his wife and found themselves in the course of a week, arguing over small and petty items which they had never done so before.  He was disturbed and shared his plight with a friend of his, who happened to be a medium.  She reminded him that he had moved in during the ghost month, and asked him to fork out what he could (even though cash was really tight) to buy some crystals, which they did.

That night, the medium went to their flat and laid out some tea light candles in a row, in the living room.  The balcony door was shut close and there was no wind in the apartment.  The medium asked his wife to light the candles. Peter Pan went off to the kitchen to pack the groceries they had bought.  When the wife lit the first candle, and moved on to the second, the flame of the first candle went out.  When she tried to light the third candle, the same thing happened to the second candle. After a few more tries, the medium said they should get Peter Pan.  Peter Pan was wondering why the two ladies needed his help to light some simple candles, but he did it anyway, without incident.  After the candles were lit, the medium asked Peter Pan to go into the balcony and put two crystals on each end of the balcony on a small ledge each.  He did.  When he reentered the living room and started to shut the balcony door, the minute the two sliding doors clicked into each other, the two crystals simultaneously dropped of their respective ledges.

The medium asked Peter Pan to pick up the crystals and describe what he saw in them. He said he saw unhappy faces in the crystals.  The medium said they were the faces of the ghosts that were now trapped in the crystals, and that Peter Pan was to throw the crystals away into the bin, and that after a month, the ghosts would disappear from the crystals.

After this, Peter Pan and his wife lived in relative peace.

Another reason why I admire Peter Pan is for his determination and his ability to accept things as they are.  In this respect he is similar to my “Chew What” friend i blogged about last year.  Peter Pan married a single mother and he accepted her child of 7 years despite numerous exhortations from his parents.  Kudos to him for standing by the side of the woman he loves and making a marriage that counts.

Life is indeed too short to worry about the what ifs and the should nots.  And I am glad that he followed his heart and made this decision the right one for him.

An-other 4 Things About You

In Relationships on February 5, 2014 at 2:48 pm

it’s been a while since I last posted – the usual – busy, lazy, tired stuff…haha.  But meeting my giant of a friend has spurred me to say all right, I’ll resume.  Coupled with the fact that this friend just admitted he was inspired to start meeting friends and learning more about them in the same manner I did two years ago, how does one not support this?  And so today my dear friends, our humble one friend a day blog will now have a grand total of TWO contributors!  haha!

I convinced contributor 2 to blog about his experiences here – why not make this blog more robust and more dynamic, with more stories and inspirations?

Contributor 2 is excited about learning 4 things about his old friends – things he never knew. So, if you get called up one day to answer 4 thing about yourself, check out this blog to see if your story’s here!

Indeed, the lives we lead are amazing and too often we fail to connect with each other to learn about each other’s stories.  I’ve realised in the last year that I do have plenty of stories to share and it is these stories that connect me with people. Stories for love, stories for business, stories for sobbing, stories for celebrating.  After all, if we live a life without any stories, would that be called life?

I always enjoy a good chat with this old buddy and he’s one of those that have stuck by me all these years – through the growing pains, the working stress, to me buying my first property even – he was there. Someone who has always been around for me to call on for a late night supper and an energising chat.  And it is this energy that we so crave for that gives us added energy to face the next day.

So over supper in the neighbourhood suburbs, and on a cold windy night out on a spanking new bike with chilly legs, i made a commitment to start writing again and here I am.  I look forward to the 4 stories my old friend has to share – and he has to share them before he forgets them (getting old, haha)!

Mr Contributor 2, over to you!